London to Darwin

Amazing how quickly one day morphs into the next on these long haul flights. Have to say the transition was eased by an excellent red wine liberally provided by the attentive Tiffany Tan. Good quality with finely balanced tannins – of course. However the night previous we enjoyed an equally good garnacha when sharing tapas in Hammersmith with daughter Steph on our Heathrow stopover. An excuse for some family gossip, comedy and a few byethens and seeyas.

Singapore Airlines brushed up pretty well and, as far as ever possible in ‘economy’, gave us a comfortable trip. Even if their breakfast time attempts to nudge more seats to choose the chicken noodle offer over the eggs hollandaise was a singular failure. Jacky unhelpfully told me something disconcerting regarding airplane water tanks which resulted in my steering well away from the offers of coffee or water. “Red wine would be great Tiffany thanks. Yes with the eggs hollandaise – super, taa Tiff.”

After all the organisation and late nights online, accompanied by my constant companions booking.com and Expedia, I’m now growing excited for it all to get underway. I obviously want to enjoy the country’s stunning geography, watch and hear its wildlife, meet and share stories with Aussies, taste their food and yes, drink their wines. I also want to renew my acquaintance with one of the tastiest beers I’ve ever had the privilege to enjoy in a cold glass – Coopers Melbourne Pale.
However while immersing ourselves for a short while in all things Oz, I want to try to understand it better, and at the risk of sounding over serious, just capture a few drops of its essence.

As a baby-boomer my Australia was framed by primary school lessons on really fun looking animals basking in sunshine, postage stamps to die for, every young boys favourite companion Skippy and, especially important for me, The Adventures of the Terrible Ten. As an 8 year old my first TV girlfriend was in the Terrible Ten. She was my secret and we’d share great innocent adventures together. Most of which resulted in my saving her from some dangerous fiend or fauna, which apparently frequented Australian neighbourhoods. I was her hero and we were 8 year old soul mates.

Whilst under no illusion that my childhood Oz was just that, over 50 years on will I find any nostalgic remnants, if not the girl from the Terrible Ten? Where is it now and what’s it really mean, if anything, to be Australian? So what’s the bigger picture, and will our short yellow brick road adventure find the underpinning essence of this young country, or simply expose, ‘Under that radiant Southern Cross‘*, its own smoke and mirrors.

So we’re seeking the Ozzie wizard. But let’s simplify things. The country has a great national anthem. One I have to admit, I put right up there with the French Marseillaise. Anthems which make you want to puff your chest out and join in with gusto, feel part of something and all those around you. ‘All in this together’ sort of stuff. No disrespect to our majesty, but our own tune doesn’t exactly pump my adrenaline. However back to the big question, or really three questions in one. When Aussies belt out ‘Advance Australia Fair’ with such genuine enthusiasm and common purpose, in their minds:
what does that Australia look like?
what’s it advancing to?
and
what’s that ‘fair’ bit really all about?

We the unicorn jockey, the croc whisperer and the freed spirit. No problem.

My concentration is suddenly broken. I don’t believe it – currently around 12000km from home and the entire Singapore to Darwin plane is being shown a video of Jamie Oliver making Yorkshire Puddings! Give me strength. Someone please announce that three things don’t travel well out of Yorkshire – Yorkshire Puddings, Tetley Bitter and football. Will also add that Silkair just put the most disgusting tray of inedible mush in front of us. Included a disturbingly grey sausage resembling an appendage cut from a long-deceased wallaby. More fit for canopic jar than my foil breakfast box. Plus now I’m trapped in the rear aisle seat twixt loo and galley. Enormous queue for the singular loo, resulting in desperate groins of all shapes and sizes confronting me every which way. Inches from my locked nose, tightly closed mouth and menacing grimace. Its not so easy to breathe like this. What a delight. Darwin where are you? Silkair announced themselves as a ‘sister airline’ to Singapore Airlines. More like ‘poor relation’.

We finally make terra firma in the ‘Top End’. In conversation with a returning national of similar age seated nearby, she described the recent weather in Darwin as ‘savage’. The plane doors open and its cooling air disappears in an instant. A ‘savage’ heat wraps itself around us. She smiles across and mouths – ‘welcome to Darwin’. For a fleeting moment the thought occurs – ‘was that the girl in the Terrible Ten?

Tomorrow the cage of death awaits.

* From Advance Australia Fair. The Southern Cross being the constellation depicted on the national flag.

Where we ate:
Toro Gordo
Great tapas in Hammersmith – and – a bonus point for stocking Diplomatico rums!

Where we stayed:
Ibis Styles Hotel – new and funky fresh decor. Good breakfast & overall great value. Bath St 5-10 mins taxi from Terminal 2. Great bus service directly outside.